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Monday, October 17, 2011

Chit Chat and All That! With Cassandre Dayne & Abby Hayes...SEX PLAY VERSUS SCENE PLAY – IS THERE A DIFFERENCE?

Cassandre Dayne and Abby Hayes

That’s actually an interesting question when you’re talking about erotic romance. Is there a difference? Abby and I have been talking about this wondering the very questions. Here’s the take I started with. I think sex play is exactly that – you’re talking and writing about sex in different positions, perhaps with same sex or the opposite sex with two or more people and could include aspects of spanking or BDSM. I think scene play is writing around the sex aspect to give you the flavor of what and how. Let me ask the readers – do you have a different feel making love with your partner in your bed at home even than being on vacation? I know I do. It’s sexier in other locations I think. With writing erotic you want to convey those delicious feelings you have around having sex, whether vanilla or kinky.

Abby and I decided to give you an idea about the difference and we’re going to chat about it. We’ll give you six scenarios of different locations so to speak so you can allow your mind to wander.

SEX ON VACATION – restaurant, hotel room, on the beach
Cassandre:  I think sex on vacation is much more delicious because you feel a bit more at ease. You’re leaving your every day life at home and you can party and play. Sometimes there’s alcohol involved. Just imagine a beautiful Caribbean island with crystal blue skies, warm lapping ocean water, puffy white clouds, light tropical breezes and a pool boy or five to bring you a wicked beverage. Whether you’re by yourself and might engage in a little playtime with a mysterious man or you’re with your partner and suddenly toys take on an entirely new meaning, it’s sexy and hot.

Abby: I’m going to agree and disagree with you on this, Cassandre. For some, like me, there is an element of anything different, like vacation, which is exhilarating because it is different, new, possibly pushing you out of your comfort zones. In a different place we get to experience new things, and sex can be one of those new things. The scene here, if played just right, can push a character out of their sexual comfort zones, make them even uncomfortable for a time, leading to that thrill of a new discovery, the sex scene getting a new high because of it. Okay, so I’m very rarely relaxed on vacation, LOL, doesn’t mean I can’t enjoy new things ;)

Cassandre:  I understand what you’re saying but I do think sometimes writers want to move outside of their comfort zone in a sense of their everyday life. While I’ve heard the trend now is that people want to read love stories about every day situations I do think there are those times people want to get away from the kids, their nagging boss, their bills and read about two people creating passion during the middle of a Tahiti vacation or rolling on the beach in St. Martin. Don’t you?

Abby: Absolutely! That is what I was saying, I love the excitement of the new even if it makes me uncomfortable – it’s a good thing! Being out of our element can be very arousing!

SEX IN THE WATER – Ocean, Shower, pool or hot tub
Cassandre:  For me I love the idea of making love in the water. My favorite thought is a lagoon under a moonlit kissed night with a waterfall in the background lighting dancing across the heat of your bodies as you hold each other completely naked in the mist. Think about hearing a bit of music in the background lighting seducing you as candles flicker near. Then the thought of a hot tub that’s cooled down just a bit so you and your partner can look at the stars as you ride him, the water lapping around you, your heart thumping in your chest and just at the moment of rapture you…  yummy

Abby: Give me a moment, I’m still enjoying your scene there! And yes, the sex is wet and wild thanks to it. I’ve always like the parts in romantic movies where the couples play in the waves of the ocean, and timed and placed just right, a little sex in the sand when you think the beach is deserted could be quite a ride. Hmmm, add in a little voyeurism there, a sole person walking along, and suddenly we have a ménage! See what some scene play can do for the sex! LOL

Cassandre:  That’s what I’m talking about. One of my favorite moments personally was a wicked even in a hot tub of a closed pool where we snuck in and the tasty treat is still something I remember today. I like to think I also give readers perhaps another taste of what they could do to kick up their passion. We get so bored with everyday sex that we don’t want it as much. Well…some don’t want it. LOL

Abby: I think that is why creating a scene is so important. Whether a reader tries or just creates new fantasies, it is important to kick it up. It just dawns on me though that the whole BDSM element, some of the toys and props used in these stories create quite a scene in and of themselves too. Recently read about getting a spanking when wet! LOL

SEX IN PUBLIC – elevator, plane, park
Cassandre:  Come now don’t tell me you’ve never wanted to join the mile high club? Imagine giving him the eye as you slip past the entire group of passengers toward that little bitty bathroom and then just as a treat for his birthday you lock the door, capture his mouth as you caress and touch and then drop to your knees giving him the naughty girl look you haven’t in a while. Or how about an elevator – you know the old kind where you can slide the key inside and stop the action between floors. He forces you to drop your things and backs you into a corner lifting your skirt and sliding his hand across your lace-covered mound. As he slips his finger past the thin elastic you swoon? Is it getting hot in here?

Abby: Sadly, I recently saw this as #69 on the show 1000 Ways To Die, and its just killed this whole scene for me literally :( I’m terrified of elevators, so going with the park! LOL which I could remember where I was reading this the other day, but it was a story where a house sat just outside a park, so the man waited for his lover on a bench to discipline her when she got home. He actually took to spanking her right on the bench. When two young women walked by and seemed intrigued, he invited them to help! Squirming in chair just thinking about it! So again, sex can be given a whole new flavor with the addition of something like a little spanking, but the scene can really offer something new entirely to the scenario.

Cassandre:  Absolutely the thrill of being caught by someone is a heady aphrodisiac. I once talked with a woman who her guy loved to have her ride in a car without a top on and would purposely take her through traffic. Not something you do if you’re afraid of getting recognized but…  I love the through in a restaurant – you know not wearing panties and slipping into the bathroom with him following closely behind. I’ve written several scenes like this. Yum.

Abby: I’m telling you, I love the going without panties thing! The excitement starts the moment you step out of the house :) And, personally, I so want to try one of those restaurant bathroom scenarios in real life!

SEX ON THE KITCHEN ISLAND – your house or another
Cassandre:  The kitchen isn’t just for eating any longer – that’s boring. After a long hard day at work you arrive home early, light some candles, put on a little saucy mood music, open a bottle of cabernet and slip into something fiery red from Victoria’s Secret. Perhaps lay out a flogger, a set of nipple clamps and your favorite vibrator and when you hear the key in the door you lean against the doorjamb absently flicking your finger into the swell of your breasts. As you beckon to him you ease back against the island and drop the thin straps on your nightie… Do you think he might take the hint?

Abby: I so agree here! Or just make yourself the buffet! Place yourself on the island with bowls of yummy foods you and your partner can enjoy off each other. Oh wait, I just totally got a new story idea here for a quite different type of dinner party! LOL Oh yeah, I like this scene, decadent foods, delicious sex…

Cassandre:  Imagine taking it a little further with a roaring fire, a bearskin rug, a basket full or toys and only a snow filled night to take you into ecstasy. Throw in a little massage and maybe some handcuffs and you have a wicked time in the making.

Abby: When you write that one, I want to know about it!!!!!!! Adding that to the sexual fantasies to do list! Off topic a little here, but for a newbie to being published, I can not tell you all I learn daily from other authors like you. I am just thrilled to share a publishing house like NNP with you.

SEX IN A CAR – just like when you were kids
Casssandre:  I was never much into parking and cars today are a bit interesting but imagine being in his big dodge ram and you’re simply traveling to the mall, perhaps to have lunch together. You encourage him to park all the way down at the end of the lane. It’s the middle of the afternoon after all. When he asks why you simply unfasten your seat belt and turn, licking your lips. As you crawl over and brush your lips across him you wink because palming his chest and reminding him exactly why he’s your man. Can you imagine a better appetizer for lunch?

Abby: What about pulled over on a deserted road riding your lover on the warm hood of the car always wondering when a car could come by… Somehow outside the home always leads me to the delightful worry of possibly getting caught.

Cassandre:  I’ve gone to lovers lane where kids are in the cars and necked a bit and I can tell you the looks I’ve received. But I love the idea of a car hood or even being spanked say across his lap in the middle of somewhere you might get caught.

Abby: That sounds nice! Being in college now, I’ve gotten to move a bit beyond the parking (was caught by cops once LOL), and into the college party scene. Can get a bit kinky there too. Lots of scenes for new stories!

Cassandre:  There’s nothing wrong with having sex in a bed. But what if you purchase those silk or satin sheets you’ve been talking about in bright crimson. Drape a few iridescent scarves around the room and throw pillows on the floor. If you’re lucky enough to have a head and foot board then go ahead and tie rope or scarves or handcuffs at the four corners telling him or her in no uncertain terms they will belong to you tonight. Extend the evening enjoying snacks and a book of poems as you re-learn each other’s bodies. How very sexy indeed.

Abby: Yes, I like in books or movies when a couple at a party sneaks into an empty bedroom for a quickie too.  So we have definitely established that scene can really help your sex scene. But, let me ask you this then, on a little different side of the coin, can there be a difference?… What about just scene play? I mean can you get your reader all hot and bothered by a scene of sexual tension? I personally love a detailed scene, two people, opposites or where like has made them enemies or their love forbidden, getting stuck somewhere together. The scene is raw, the feeling are there but fought, and even if they never touch but for brief seconds of getting too close, it can be oh so hot! What do you think, Cassandre?

Cassandre:  I love when you create sexual tension and I think you can and not do anything with it immediately. Just touching someone can be so hot and then unable to do anything whether because of the fact you’re already involved – oh I’ve had that one more times than not too. It’s a forbidden – you can look but not touch, you can hunger but not taste and it really excites readers. I think there’s a song like that.

Abby: Yes, the forbidden – I like that a lot! So, do you think that over the course of this discussion we have found that it isn’t so much the difference between scene and sex play, that even in a scene without actual sex but sexual tension, that the two need to play off each other, can only enrich each other?

I hope that we’ve given you not only some insights in to how we create out little worlds of fantasy but perhaps give you some delicious ideas about how to sauce up your sexy life. After all – kinky is a good thing…

Links to Cassandre Dayne
Website: htttp://

Links to Abby Hayes

Please help Abby Hayes, she will be ecstatic to receive support


  1. Nice chat ladies! Some food for thought me all sorts of wicked ideas :)

  2. You don't need any any more than I do! LOL

  3. Great work here. I'm sorry for a seven day late response, bu that was awesome!